Hull City Council have refused an application by Hull KR for a victory parade, and full civic reception, after they clinched the Clive Sullivan Trophy.
The victorious Championship outfit ran out eventual 40-16 winners, in what may prove to be their biggest game of the season.
Councillor Colin Maul responded to the application personally. “It’s ridiculous. We spent £50,000 on a parade the last time they won a trophy in 2015…what? They didn’t win it. Hang on, I need to make a call…”
The club had planned a seven hour open top bus tour of East Hull, followed by a parade through town converging on Saville Street, culminating in a queue to lay a turd outside the Hull FC shop.
Hull KR fan Buster Klondyke, interviewed as he was building a giant bonfire for his effigy of Mick Crane, said: “This is one of the greatest days in our club’s history. To beat the old enemy by such a score! They’re gonna have proper trouble in Super League, if they play like that every week. Idiots.”
Humberside Police have also been struggling to contain the animalistic celebrations that have sprung up around the burnt-out remains of Isaac Newton School.
They advise staying indoors until Rovers fans ‘develop a sense of perspective’. Up the Cream! however, believes this may never happen.